Did ya do a double-take? Holy clickbait, Batman!
April Fools! Yeah, I'm a day late but it would have been obvious yesterday.
Had to do it! OK, the scene is a classroom, around 4th or 5th grade. A young boy sits at his desk with his notebook and a pencil. He's not taking notes about math or history. He's drawing a picture... of a shoe.
For as long as I can remember I have loved shoes. Do you remember L.A. Lights? The ones that lit up when you walked? And BK Knights, which I'm pretty sure I had a pair of way back when.
I don't remember my first Nikes. My mom said my grandma bought some for me when I was a baby, so maybe it was just ingrained in me from day one. After 3rd grade I moved from a house on a dirt road in Elgin, TX to Thomasville, NC. In Thomasville, shoes were a culture.
I wasn't in Kansas anymore, Toto, where people wore work and cowboy boots.
This was mid-90's urban culture and kids wore Jordans, Air Maxes, Adidas Superstars, and even Filas (which are somehow trending again despite their ridiculous looks).
There is a recent documentary about the Air Max 90 - which is considered the legend that started the culture surrounding sneakers - and someone made the comment:
The corniest guy in the world could put on the Air Max 90's and you'd still say, "He's got the good shoes, though."
I feel like I embodied that - I was the corniest guy (probably still am) - and I love the feeling when someone says, "Hey, I like those shoes."
To this day, I still love shoes - and I have a near-constant internal battle about them.
I grew up kind of between two worlds. On the one hand I was raised by parents who didn't value material items... like shoes. Shoes were necessary items bought for a purpose not for fashion. But I understood it differently. Yes, they had a purpose, but they could also be a statement piece.
Girls got to wear earrings and necklaces. For me it was shoes.
I'm getting married this summer. Yay! Anyway, on to more pressing matters... my shoes. Obviously I have to have the right shoes for the occasion. My favorite shoes all of my life have been sneakers, but I can't wear sneakers to my wedding because that would be a little too casual. Well, I could... but I won't for her sake.
I've been going down dress shoe rabbit holes recently. Now, it started with a pair that I would consider my "Holy Grail" of shoes. Not because of how they look, what they're made of, or what image I would project by wearing them. They're made by a British company, Cheaney, the style of shoe would be considered a "derby brogue," and the model is the Tenterden.
That mean anything to you? Doubt it.
I didn't expect it to. That's not important.
While I was down in my rabbit hole I started discovering a lot about dress shoes and the different styles.
I know a fair amount about sneakers. What people sometimes refer to colloquially as "tennis shoes" but really there are very few pairs of actual tennis shoes on the market. But I know nothing about dress shoes.
Up until recently, my understanding of "dress" shoes was that if they were brown or black and made of leather then they were dress shoes. While not entirely untrue these days, it's not a fair assessment of the genre.
Similar to my view of dress shoes, I think many older heads (read, Gen X and beyond) see athletic shoes or sneakers (did you know they are called that because of their rubber soles - when they were introduced people said they were so quiet you could sneak up on someone?) as all the same thing. Rubber soles with a big logo or extravagantly designed upper? Must be sneakers. Far from it!
Basketball shoes are designed with cushioning and stiffness in the sole so players can run for long periods and make quick cuts without a lot of flex in the shoe. Running shoes are designed to be lightweight with lots of cushioning and lots of flex - and many have reflective surfaces so if you're running in the dark there are more ways to be seen. Actual tennis shoes have supportive uppers with extra cushioning for long matches. Then there are simple casual shoes which may look similar to a running or basketball shoe but are not designed for performance. They're the activewear of athletic shoes. The design and purpose of each is different.
A friend of mine wears his basketball shoes for running and it annoys the hell out of me. Basketball shoes are stiffer and heavier, designed to be fine for short sprints and impact cushioning. Running shoes are light and flexible, allowing your foot to land heel first and roll smoothly forward.
Wearing the wrong performance shoes is like putting chains on your tires to drive in the rain.
It's the same thing for what up until recently I would have referred to as dress shoes.
Oxford-style shoes, for example, used to be required of London bankers back in the day. If you were coming in to work in the city, you wore Oxfords. They are a more "formal" shoe with closed lacing. Derbies were a "country" style and became the rebel shoe back in the day (early 1900's) as younger students rebelled against the formalities of their elders. They had open lacing and a wider sole - think of Doc Martens - and became more popular as casual attire was allowed into the workplace. Other styles include Bluchers, similar to Derbies but with a one-piece upper, and Full or Semi-Brogues, which include decorative features like a toe cap or wingtip with perforations.
If you have a high arch/instep like me, you might opt for a Derby instead of an Oxford as the open lacing allows for wider feet to go in. A Derby Brogue (see the Tenterden at the bottom) is a shoe that displays style while remaining comfortable. If you're going to a black-tie event, you'd likely see Oxfords which are going to fit a bit more snugly.
There are many more styles - inspired by different lifestyles: loafers, driving shoes, boat shoes, hiking shoes, etc. Just like sneakers and dress shoes, they all have different design and performance features and are made for a purpose. Style and function.
A purpose and a statement.
So, now, here I sit. Attempting to make a decision about what type of shoes I want to wear to mark this special occasion in my life. Battling the two voices in my head.
The first voice, we'll call it Boomie, says, "Dude, it's one day. Why are you spending all of this time and effort - and potentially money - thinking about your shoes?"
Voice two, we'll call Millie, chimes in, "Bruh, it's THE day. You have to show out. Your friends and family are gonna be there and they're going to know."
Boomie, "No one's going to care about your shoes. Like Morgan Freeman in Shawshank Redemption said, 'How often do you really look at a man's shoes?'"
Millie, "Listen Boom, this isn't 1920 when everyone wore the same shoes. This is 2021. Even if they don't look at the shoes and know what they are, they'll know you put thought into it. And you'll know, which will make you feel like a million bucks."
Boomie, "And? Who cares? It's shoes. They're brown, they match, you did your job."
Millie, "Nah, bro. You're only doing this once. And there's 5 different shades of brown. When you look back at your pictures in 20 or 30 years, you're going to see those and remember. You'll remember how you felt in those shoes."
Boomie, "You millennials and your feelings. Save that money and put it in the stock market."
Millie, "Ughhh, here we go with this. Put it in Bitcoin..."
Aaaaaand we're off-topic. Way to go, brain.
And yes, the voices in my head talk to me in dude-bro terms.
The little boy who was drawing shoes at his desk still exists inside me. In fact, I still have dreams of designing my own shoes, learning about textiles and how to make comfortable soles from recycled materials. Some companies are beating me to the punch, like Wolf & Shepherd and their athlete-inspired dress shoes which are a hybrid of comfort and style. Nike has a new "space hippie" line which are shoes made from partly recycled materials.
But as a grown person who values things beyond just a pair of shoes it's difficult for me to justify spending valuable time and hard-earned dollars on shoes.
But if I get leather ones and take care of them they'll last a long time.
But it's a lot of money.
But if they last then that money is divided over time and it's a good investment.
Here I go again.
I'm a man who likes his shoes.
So I'm probably gonna get some dope shoes in the hopes that someone says, "He's got the good shoes, though."
Thanks for reading.
The Holy Grail:
Whew! Glad you showed your choice before the big day. I'll have to replace my 70's "dress shoes" so as not to clash with your kicks pick.